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Saturday, 31 May 2014

This nerd's musings on himself (part 2)

Just watched two recent summer blockbusters X-Men Days of Future Past and Edge of Tomorrow which feature time travel that will mess up your head with the various paradoxes that it create. I too, can time travel into the future. If you wanna know what happens 1 hour from now, I'll tell you in 60mins time. Wanna travel back in time? Just look into my wardrobe.

With my idol Ryan Giggs retiring from professional soccer from my beloved Manchester United, I have no more sporting heroes left for me to worship. I need a new team that exude great teamwork, grace and colourful characters with great physique. The Russian Women Synchronised Swimming team fits the bill...swimmingly.

I am ashamed to say that I have been unfaithful recently. I was bored with my life so I tried something new and exotic. But after I gave in to my primal lust, it didn't last long to realise that they were just flings and didn't excite me like my true love who is able to keep me up all night. So no more English Breakfast Tea or Chai Latte, my heart belongs to Earl Grey.

Someone has threatened to upload lewd picture of me online but I think I can resolve this peacefully. Hence I've decided not to teach my mum how to set up a Facebook account so that my toddler photo of me peeing at Chinese Garden will never see the light of day.

Should you ever be jolted wide awake screaming your lungs out early morning by a lizard, please forgive it for being a dumb creature looking for food at all the weird places like the toilet and shoe cabinet. They were not allowed to venture in the kitchen as agreed in the negotiation meeting with the Cockroaches which I attended as Observer.

The award-winning theme song from the award-winning animation Frozen is a great inspirational song for all occasions. Especially now during my troubled time sitting alone on my throne when things don't go smoothly. I just sing in my head "Let it go, let it go, Can't hold it back anymore".

More musings on myself. 

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