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Sunday, 18 October 2015

Smoke Gets In Your Eyes - My hazy post (updated 19 Oct)

Haze haze, Go away
Come again? Someone will pay!

 *****
Any smart Singaporean will look beyond the haze situation and see something positive. I tried doing that and I'm positive that the only thing I see is just more haze.

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I think it is fair to say that all Singaporeans would have experienced our local version of '50 shades of grey' from the haze from the past two months and counting. Similar to those who have watched the erotic movie, Singaporeans are left gasping for air at the horror they have witnessed, and hoping to sue the perpetrators for the anguish they have suffered.

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Halloween 2015: Most common fashion accessory- a N95 face mask. Most scary costume - Indonesian palm plantation owner with a lighted match in one hand and a bottle of palm oil in the other.
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 PSI says 80, but looks like 100, smells like 150 and yet my body feels like 50. WTF! Which sense should I trust before I go for my run? I'll rely on my common sense....and be a couch potato instead.

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Note to self when wearing face-mask :
1. Don't stick your tongue out and taste the face-mask. It is not food. Bad tongue. Serve you right.
2. You already had lunch. Don't burp into the mask and re-sample what you ate. Stupid tummy.
3. Don't wipe your face or mouth with face-mask. It is not a tissue-paper.

***** 
I'm not able to admire the dolled-up office ladies each morning on my way to work now that they have an additional fashion accessory of a face-mask. But it is surprising to note that with only the peepers in view, it is still possible to distinguish the babes from the non-babes.

 *****

Though schools are closed today (25 Sep), adults will still dutifully report for work so as to use the office aircon and charge their electronic devices and powerbanks. And thus smart employers should allow their staff to work from home. Have I ever told you that I have a clever boss?
*****

 Nothing like a hint of blue sky to chase the blues away. Let's keep it up, or rather, the PSI down. And if all goes well, the only burnt smell Singapore gets over the weekend will be concentrated at the Marina Bay area from the tyres of 20 F1 cars.

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Rare local sights: 1. An llao llao outlet with no queue. 2. Tech shows with no credit card booths. 3. A train with no one playing Candy Crush. 4. Blue sky.

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I can see immediate effect of the haze on my health. Since I'm forced to stay indoors, I had to forego my evening runs. And I end up exercising my mouth muscles from nibbling on junk food while watching Netflix. I think I would be healthier outdoors with the haze than indoors.

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latest scoreline:
Haze 1- Thunderstorm 0
Constant clicking on 'Refresh' button 1 - NEA Haze microsite 0  (the site crashed)

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 Urgent need of Graphic Designer to manipulate the picture I see out of my window. Need to import white clouds, enhance blue sky and delete the f**king haze! I don't need to see 50 shades of grey!

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Desperate times call for desperate measures. During this hazy period, we should maintain our last line of natural air filtration and let our nose hair grow and flourish. Health is more important than committing social faux pas.

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